THE DOUBTFUL GUEST
This is a secret society
Good evening, whenever you are.
I spent two weekends performing and visiting friends at the SF Sketchfest, and between them I rested quietly in the LA home of my favorite secret family, Paul and Janie.
You may remember that I used to stay with them a lot back when I was on TV more. As I have written before, they are very kind and fun hosts, and staying with them reminds me of being a weird only child again, reading Edward Gorey alone in my room, waiting to be called to dinner.
It was a very cozy way to spend some time between state sanctioned murders, let me tell you.
I was tired after that first weekend in SF, because I’m old and, it turns out, on the verge of a cold but also because: we all are tired.
In San Francisco we had wonderful shows. Thanks to everyone who came out to see me and Janet and Adam Savage for our E PLURIBUS MOTTO show (available NOW!). I learned a lot about the sex life of banana slugs. Ask me about it when you see me. I want to talk about it.
And thanks to everyone who came out for Judge John Hodgman, where we had a truly impressive and dangerous prop on stage, a father-daughter school project that I still can’t believe was real. You’ll be SEEING IT on Youtube soon, so please subscribe.
But it was especially moving to perform with Bill Corbett, Kevin Murphy, Frank Conniff and Trace Beaulieu, and also to see John Moe, all of them having just left the cold and dread of the creep-patrolled streets of the Twin Cities. And the inspiring resistance to those creeps being mounted there.
We all know we’re lucky to be living with this sadness, this on-purpose terror, only now in our lives. Some have lived with it for generations. We are lucky to be able to take a break and make goofs on stage. Don’t think we don’t know how lucky we are.
Not just to be as relatively safe as we are, but to be in a job (goofs on stage) that provides not only us, but others, with an occasional break and distraction. Some recharge for the fights ahead.
That said, if you need to take a truly restful break from it all, may I suggest lying in Paul and Janie’s guest room of an early evening, as Janie is making dinner?
That’s what I did last week. I didn’t have any Edward Gorey with me, so instead I watched this HEAVILY researched and detailed video about the uniforms of STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE.
I’ll be chasing that intense feeling of calm and well being for the rest of my life. Those uniforms are so beige and placid, and I was feeling so beige and placid too that I missed the text summoning me to dinner.
But Paul and Janie were not mad. And we ate dinner, and then we watched the an episode of VANDERPUMP RULES: THE NEXT GENERATION. And then we recorded a little podcast about it.
And it’s a good thing we did! Because by the time I got back to SF for weekend two I was already feeling sick. I had to miss THE FLOP HOUSE at Cobbs so I could eat soup alone in my hotel room and do some more thinking about those comfortable/comforting Starfleet leisure suits.
And as I write this, I’m still sick! Because sometimes you take a break and recharged and raring to go. (And I promise you, I will rare again! )
But sometimes you take a break and the break says: I’m not done yet.
And your body and your stuffy lungs and exhausted body tell you about it, because you can’t stay awake for more than a few hours and your voice sounds like Tom Waits sent a bottle of FernetBranca through a fax machine to a Tuvan throat singer. (see below)
So I cannot read Moby Dick to you this time. But luckily, I have something better to offer up in the secret room.
Here’s a little preview of me and Paul and Janie talking Vanderpump:
You don’t need to watch the show to enjoy the whole conversation, any more than you have to live with Paul and Janie to enjoy their good company. You can hang out with them ALL THE TIME if you, like me, are a subscriber to WEEKEND WATER.
In the episode we talk about the show, but also some secret stuff from my past, and also you can maybe start to hear my voice starting to fail.
(That’s how my voice started. Before I send you up the stairs, here’s how it’s going.)
Before you ascend, I would be remiss not to mention my UPCOMING SHOWS AT THE BELL HOUSE IN BROOKLYN…
